American Idol

Today, I'm doing a short version of Idol coverage to minimize the pain for Janice.
1. Blond. She's in.
2. Single dad, wife's dead. He's not that good. He's in.
3. Australian dude. He's in.

Man, they're sending so many suck people to Hollywood, I find myself wondering again if Idol is rigged. Is it? I can't find anything but speculation on last year so far, but I am finding this huge rash of criticism aimed at Idol producers for the way they're running the show. The gist is this:

"When American Idol debuted in 2002, its supposed goal was to find the best undiscovered talent in America. Singers like Kelly Clarkson and Clay Aiken, who had dreams of stardom but never had the connections, were catapulted to megastardom. The producers found diamonds in the rough and launched their careers," writes Vote for the Worst, the web site that famously encourages people to vote for people like Sanjaya.

"But a disturbing trend has surfaced with the spoiled contestants of American Idol 7 – they’re no longer even remotely undiscovered talent. A large percentage of them are failed singers and entertainers who have already had their shot at fame. Yet Idol thinks that repackaging these failures is a good idea to make us watch their show. Gone are the days where you or your friends could try out for Idol and make it big. Now you have to already have connections. ...this year’s show will just be a boring hash of recycled pseudo-celebrities who weren’t good enough to make it the first time around.

..."So what’s wrong with this? Well, it’s forcing Idol to expose its hand as the premiere marketing tool for struggling artists. Instead of discovering the next big superstar, music executives are deciding who should be popular and getting them on to Idol. Many people watch American Idol because they think they can help make the next big music star out of an Everyday Joe or Jane. But Carly and her large number of has-been companions are merely failed artists who are being planted on the show by their sources to promote themselves. Would the hundreds of thousands of people who auditioned this year be happy to learn that their spot was given to someone who already had connections?"

Then follows an amazing list of all the people on the show so far and the details behind how the record labels have tried and failed to launch their lame ass careers. What a rip. Worth reading past the jump.

Next: Three losers. They're not in.

4. A chick who thinks she's Mariah Carey. Wow. She really sucks. "It was actually terrible," Dawg says. Not in.
5. Guy in a sombrero with a mime. No.
6. Monique, singing Whitney. NOOOO. She cries. "Maybe I picked the wrong song." No, that's not it.
7. Her friend Destiny, or whatever his name is, sings horribly too. "Does that sound good to you, Christopher?" Simon says. "There wasn't a single note in tune." He won't stop singing. The guards take him away.
8. Some chick who is in love with Simon and can actually sing. She's going.
9. A guy who has tried out 10 times. Once in a statue of liberty outfit. Not in.

Bunch of losers. No, no, no. No, and no.

10. A guy named David. He's in.
11. Here comes Carly, one of the planted chicks, according to Vote for the Worst. According to VFTW: "Carly Smithson is the epitome of a record industry failure. She was brought to America by MCA Records and recorded a bland pop album that sold only 300 copies (that’s not a typo)." So what, she's in.

And ... it's a wrap.